Quentin Tarantino
Tarantino exists several minutes before he leaves platform, sources confirm
- Location
- Zurich Hauptbahnhof platform 7, approximately 14:23 local time, near the Appenzell regional train bay
- Currently
- Simultaneously rewatching and reshooting his own filmography in reverse
- Last confirmed sighting
- Still arriving as he was finishing his earlier departure, 3 June
- Observations
- Is legally contractually obligated to complete himself before the opening credits finish rolling.
Quentin Tarantino arrived at platform 7 on Tuesday at 14:27, having already been observed leaving the station seven minutes prior. Witnesses noted no temporal duplication—merely an overlap of departure and arrival, with Tarantino visible in both configurations, gesticulating about the Godard retrospective playing on the waiting-room monitor. He acknowledged both events with equal intensity, as though each was a scene requiring his full attention.
The scheduling office reports Mr Tarantino will continue this arrangement through autumn, with confirmed non-sequences on alternate Tuesdays. August sees his most intensive overlap: three separate arrivals before the first documented departure, each event preceded by a fifteen-minute interior monologue. Zurich station management have installed additional seating to accommodate the temporal accumulation, and refreshment facilities report significant demand during the gap periods.
When contacted through the station announcer, Mr Tarantino transmitted the following statement: 'The chronology is intentional. You cut between the moment you leave and the moment you enter, you find the meaning in the space between. I am that space. Also, someone here is making an excellent espresso and I want to know who, because there's a scene I'm shooting in 1994 that requires this exact bitterness.' He then vanished for six minutes before reappearing mid-sentence.
Do not address him on platform 7 until he has finished whatever he is leaving or arriving into.
Actual status (not satire) No death recorded as of 22 October 2026. Born 27 March 1963. Source: Wikidata
E&OE. The Registry accepts no liability for misclassification, temporal displacement or loss of personhood arising from this record. Photographs are computer-generated approximations and almost guaranteed to show a different person entirely.