Registry of Existential Status
Service update: Form M-3 is temporarily unavailable. Reclassifications back to “person” may take longer than usual.

Check the current status of a public figure

Maybe they didn't die, or were never alive. The Registry can tell you where they are, what they currently are, and how confident it is that they exist.

Famous people only. The Registry does not hold records on private individuals, minors or reality television personalities.

Archived · New record available

Status record

Mike Tyson Boxer

CHIEFLY GESTURAL

"He's doing the hand movements at the post office again." — Derek, sorting clerk

Existence confidence provisional
A generated photo of an anonymous stranger. It is not the person named.
Mike Tyson blows up a deflated balloon at a bus station in Mexico City, cheeks expanded with effort, a parked coach behind him and a tinny radio playing faintly from a waiting area speaker.
Location
A mail depot basement in Newtown, two kilometres from the central Wellington post office, beside the parcel sorting tables.
Currently
Converting seventeen rounds of championship bouts into hand positions, week four.
Last confirmed sighting
Thursday, 2 p.m., signalling frantically near the Victoria Street postal union office.
Observations
Can communicate a full left hook combination in under three seconds of pure semaphore.

Michael G. Tyson is currently midway through the systematic conversion of his competitive career into semaphore signal sequences. The work began in March at the Newtown depot and has progressed through his early fights with increasing complexity. Local postal workers report that he arrives each weekday at 6 a.m. sharp, in tracksuit and trainers, and spends eight hours at the tables with a laminated reference guide.

Wellington City Council has received forty-three separate complaints from residents who say the semaphore practice is visible through basement windows after dark and causes unease. However, three separate commendations have arrived from the Athletics and Signals Society, praising the precision of his flag work and the documentary accuracy of each sequence. The council's transport committee notes that queuing times at the post office have not been affected.

"I've seen him do the whole Lennox Lewis fight in fifteen minutes flat," says Brenda, a postal sorter who works the night shift. "The hand speed is identical to what you see on the old tapes. He doesn't tire. Just flags and flags, like the arms remember what the gloves did."

Guidance for the public

Members of the public should not approach the signalling tables during active conversions. Observe from the viewing gallery only.

Actual status (not satire) No death recorded as of 22 October 2026. Born 30 June 1966. Source: Wikidata

E&OE. The Registry accepts no liability for misclassification, temporal displacement or loss of personhood arising from this record. Photographs are computer-generated approximations and almost guaranteed to show a different person entirely.