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Status record

Eddie Izzard Comedian

ROUTE 43 HOSTAGE TO TANGENTIAL STORYTELLING

Available weekdays, 9:15am to 4:40pm, subject to urgent digression

Existence confidence provisional
A generated photo of an anonymous stranger. It is not the person named.
Eddie Izzard stands at a park-and-ride shelter in Oxford holding a tea cup, mid-gesture while explaining something at length to an empty bench, one foot slightly forward as if perpetually mid-stride.
Location
Bonnington bus shelter, south side, near the twin launderettes on Leamington Terrace
Currently
Rail replacement bus driver, route 43, narrates entire journeys as historical monologues
Last confirmed sighting
Thursday 14:22, explaining the Etruscan origins of the number seven to a pensioner at the stop
Observations
Refuses to wear the regulation polo shirt; insists the wig and heels are legally mandatory under ancient Edinburgh by-law 447.

Eddie has been assigned to the Leamington to Granton service since Monday. The bus operates on schedule, but passengers report journeys now last considerably longer, as each departure is preceded by a seven-minute routine about the architectural history of whatever building they're stopped outside.

Monday 9:17am: departed on time, added fifteen minutes discussing Roman fort logistics. Tuesday 13:45: traffic backed up three blocks; Eddie was in the middle seat doing the entire Hadrian's Wall bit with both arms. Wednesday morning: managed three stops before pivoting into the Turkish bath history of Drummond Street. Thursday 14:22: attempted to keep commentary to announcements only; failed by Leith Walk; resumed full costume-change routine at traffic lights.

Edinburgh Transport tried removing the public address system on Wednesday. Eddie simply narrated louder, using the stairwell as acoustic amplification. They suggested pre-written route cards on Thursday; he returned them annotated with cross-referenced historical footnotes. A supervisor rode the route yesterday and asked him to 'just drive'; Eddie drove in silence for four stops, then began explaining the emotional subtext of each road marking in elaborate detail.

Guidance for the public

Do not engage with narrative tangents. Simply nod and disembark at your destination.

Actual status (not satire) No death recorded as of 22 October 2026. Born 7 February 1962. Source: Wikidata

E&OE. The Registry accepts no liability for misclassification, temporal displacement or loss of personhood arising from this record. Photographs are computer-generated approximations and almost guaranteed to show a different person entirely.