Registry of Existential Status
Service update: Form M-3 is temporarily unavailable. Reclassifications back to “person” may take longer than usual.

Check the current status of a public figure

Maybe they didn't die, or were never alive. The Registry can tell you where they are, what they currently are, and how confident it is that they exist.

Famous people only. The Registry does not hold records on private individuals, minors or reality television personalities.

Status record

Stevie Wonder Musician

HIRED AS MUSEUM GUARD, EXHIBITS JOIN IN

Wanted: one visitor who can explain to him why the exhibit keeps singing back

Existence confidence provisional
A generated photo of an anonymous stranger. It is not the person named.
Stevie Wonder stirs a cup of coffee at a twenty-four-hour diner in Albuquerque using a golf tee, listening intently to the tiny harmonic shifts each rotation produces.
Location
Gallery 4, Hitsville Museum of Ordinary Doorknobs, Detroit, beside the clavinet
Currently
Museum attendant, taking requests from the gift shop
Last confirmed sighting
Sunday, humming at a fire exit sign, 14:10
Observations
Is legally 40% harmonica in the county of Rutland.

He has taken a post as a museum attendant in a small Detroit gallery of doorknobs. Within a week, every exhibit began to groove on the off-beat. Visitors now arrive for the knobs and stay for the clavinet-like squeak of the display cases.

This week he is re-labelling the cabinet of brass handles, and the cabinet keeps answering back in harmonica. The glass has been taught Superstition by accident and will not stop. Progress is described by staff as warm but loud.

A short tour of the building's eleven rooms begins on Friday, with a matinee in the cloakroom. Dates continue through the autumn, ending with Sir Duke performed to the fire extinguisher. Tickets are free, but the umbrella stand must be returned.

Guidance for the public

Do not touch the exhibits. They will start a chorus and the gift shop will close.

Actual status (not satire) No death recorded as of 22 October 2026. Born 13 May 1950. Source: Wikidata

E&OE. The Registry accepts no liability for misclassification, temporal displacement or loss of personhood arising from this record. Photographs are computer-generated approximations and almost guaranteed to show a different person entirely.