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Status record

Sharon Osbourne TV and radio

JUDGES FARMERS' FIELDS FROM 900 FEET

Wanted: second sandbag handler, first one keeps managing the basket and judging the landings

Existence confidence provisional
A generated photo of an anonymous stranger. It is not the person named.
Sharon Osbourne waits on a Zurich platform with a carrier bag of tour snacks, a small fluffy dog tucked under one arm.
Location
Basket of a hot air balloon tethered above Birmingham's Bull Ring, Row C
Currently
Ballast handler, managing the crew and marking every landing
Last confirmed sighting
Tipping a sandbag over Edgbaston while scoring the landing out of ten
Observations
Can hear a sandbag think about falling from three fields away.

She has taken a job as ballast handler on a hot air balloon out of Birmingham, hauling forty sandbags each morning. Within the hour she had assigned the pilot a contract, a new haircut and a firm talking-to about altitude. Every drop is accompanied by a score out of ten.

Local farmers near Solihull now wake to a voice from above announcing which field is through to the next round. Sheep have started lining up in the order of their bleating. The tea van at the launch site has doubled its mugs and added a small gong.

Monday, 6.10 a.m.: first sandbag dropped, scored a seven. Wednesday, 2 p.m.: the balloon was managed to a gentle landing and the basket refused to leave without notes. Friday, 7.45 a.m.: a small fluffy dog was added to the crew as supervisor. Saturday, 11 a.m.: nobody has been allowed to leave until the sandbags are re-auditioned.

Guidance for the public

Do not wave at the balloon; she will score it.

Actual status (not satire) No death recorded as of 22 October 2026. Born 9 October 1952. Source: Wikidata

E&OE. The Registry accepts no liability for misclassification, temporal displacement or loss of personhood arising from this record. Photographs are computer-generated approximations and almost guaranteed to show a different person entirely.