Registry of Existential Status
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Status record

Jon Stewart Comedian

AUTUMN EDITION ON SALE FROM CANAL BARGE

Item 7: members noted the autumn edition of the Treasurer had been placed on the village hall noticeboard again

Existence confidence provisional
A generated photo of an anonymous stranger. It is not the person named.
Jon Stewart straightens a tiny station platform sign at a model railway exhibition, raising one eyebrow at the miniature passengers.
Location
Behind the third bollard on a towpath in Amsterdam, beside a houseboat with a desk
Currently
Anchoring the autumn edition from a desk on a barge
Last confirmed sighting
Behind a news desk in a boxed set, Amsterdam towpath, Tuesday
Observations
Can raise one eyebrow high enough to be seen from a passing barge.

Jon Stewart is now released in seasonal editions, and the autumn one is currently on sale from a barge moored on an Amsterdam canal towpath. The edition comes with a desk, a stack of loose papers and a slightly damp swivel chair. Spring and summer editions are expected to return in due course.

The council tried recalling the autumn edition and issuing the summer one in its place, but the desk would not fit through the door. A sternly worded letter was read aloud to the papers, which shuffled themselves and carried on. The edition continues to raise one eyebrow at all correspondence.

"I sell tulip bulbs from the next stall and I've watched him do the news to the geese since seven," said Annelies, a bulb seller. "He turns to the camera, which is a lamp post, and gives it a look. The geese seem to understand every word and have started to nod."

Guidance for the public

Check the season on the label before taking him home.

Actual status (not satire) No death recorded as of 22 October 2026. Born 28 November 1962. Source: Wikidata

E&OE. The Registry accepts no liability for misclassification, temporal displacement or loss of personhood arising from this record. Photographs are computer-generated approximations and almost guaranteed to show a different person entirely.